Staying at Home

I have this secret desire to be a stay at home mom. Even just for the first few years. I have several reasons for this desire and I feel like SO and I could still live comfortably if I stayed home... or even worked part time.

Reasons:

1. This might be my only child. And I don't want to miss anything.

2. I don't want strangers raising my baby

3. If I work and have to put baby in day care, all I'm doing is working to afford day care...

4. I think I'm meant to. I've done a lot of things over the years. My favorite job being when I managed the foaling barn in NY. I've had jobs I've loved but not enough to do forever, like working at the track or at the dog kennel. I really like what I'm doing now but is it worth it to lose all those precious moments I could have with my little one? To me the answer is no. Maybe I'm delusional but I think I'm meant to be a mom and that I need to take that time to stay home and raise my child myself.

5. The first few years of you child's life are their most impressionable. If you send them to day care where they aren't allowed to talk about God and where they are told what to think and believe by a bunch of strangers that most definitely do not know what's best for your child, then you're going to have problems. My mom home schooled both my brother and I for a few years. Even in the Christian school I was told what to think and believe and it wasn't always good. I was in Preschool and was told I was wrong for being ahead of the class, already knowing how to write small words. I want my baby to be free to express her self. To not be held back because it might make the other students feel bad. To be able to pray and talk about her beliefs. If you ask me, one of the BIGGEST problems in our country is no one raises their own children anymore. You spend a few hours a night with them. Meanwhile they have spent all day having their head filled with garbage. Being embarrassed for talking about God or praying before a mean. Told that they aren't allowed. They aren't taught morals and values, Christian or otherwise. We can't expect teachers and the school system to raise or babies. We can't expect our children to know what we want them to if someone else has raised them. And then we can't act shocked when they do something bad and say "oh she knows better!" Really? Does she? Because I'm pretty sure the school didn't teach her better.

Some schools are the exception to this. But I still wouldn't want my child attending too early in life. I went to Catholic school for 3 years and if I could have managed, I would have attended for high school as well. The values they taught in every single class matched the values and beliefs I was being taught at home. Debate was welcome. Differences celebrated. No one felt unwelcome or embarrassed. And the education was top notch.


Maybe I'll get bored being a SAHM but maybe it will be exactly what I've been meant to do all this time. I guess I never know until I try. I've been thinking about job options for being a SAHM, like perhaps I could babysit at home a few days a week. Actually... that's all I've come up with.

I haven't made a decision yet. But being a momma and raising a baby is a big deal. It's not something you leave to strangers. You're raising a human being. Someone that has to grow up to be a mature, functioning member of society. You don't leave that to strangers.