Thankful

Today I am thankful for feeling my baby move for the first time last night.

Earlier in the evening I thought I might be having Braxton-Hicks contractions. Just uncomfortable pressure in my lower belly, like where menstrual craps are experienced. They'd come and go with no real pattern. But I've also been doing a lot in the last week or so. Inside and outside the house. I wasn't sure if that's really what was going on of if I was just tired and strained. So on the advice of a mom friend, I took a warm shower and got comfy in bed.

I'm sitting there in bed snacking on animal crackers and drinking apple juice like a 5 year old when I felt a weird gas bubble.... but only on one side of my belly and up a bit higher than gas normally is. I thought could this be my baby moving?? So I got my stethoscope out and listened.

I could hear the heart beat, loud and strong. And I could hear the pops and pow of baby dancing, kicking and punching around in my belly. I was laughing and crying. It was amazing. I wake up every day wondering if I'll feel baby today and never do. I was thrilled. It was so cool and so amazing. I can't wait until I feel it again.

And in less than a week I go for my anatomy ultrasound!!

I hope everyone else has a wonderful day with family and friends.

Missing my Lola

Lola was a dog we had for nearly 4 years. She was killed by a car a year ago in October. She was my heart dog. My best friend. We were so close and did everything together. We went all over town together. When the nieces and nephews came over, she was the favorite to play with and she just loved the kids.

always let me dress her up

I'm missing her because I know how great she would be with baby. She would be protective, never let anyone hurt or take baby. She would be gentle and loving and be another momma to baby.

the little girls loved to take Lola for walks

Lola loved her kitties. Sure, she chased them. But she also loved them. She treated them like little puppies. Licking them and snuggling them. I know she would have been an amazing big sister.

one of Lola's babies

I think Roader will be a great big brother. I think at times he will probably get jealous and mad, but for the most part I think he will be gentle and loving, instead of aloof and cranky.

old man Roader

Mona I'm not so sure about. I haven't seen her around kids yet. I really need to see her around kids. I have been working with her in the future nursery. She pretty much knows when we're in there, not matter what I'm doing, to go lay down on her mat in front of the little bookshelf and stay there. I have been working with her on no jumping, because she has a really bad habit of it. I work on her but then SO 'boxes' with her and gets her jumping and all worked up again..... not helpful. We still have about 4 months to work on things....

Practicing how to behave in the nursery

Ranger would have been a great big brother too. But Lola.... Lola would have been amazing. And I miss her so much. I would never have had to worry about her ever around baby. Mona I will have to watch like a hawk. Lola I could have let be and do whatever and have known she would be helping me take excellent care of baby.

happy go-lucky Ranger. who I also miss too much

There have been some losses this week. And I guess I'm just sad and hormonal all around. I saw a photo of Lola on Facebook this morning and it just made me miss her so much.

most beautiful moose girl

Boy or Girl?

I find out in 11 days whether we are having a boy or a girl. I have wanted a girl so bad then I realized.... I don' know if I want a girl. I don't do tea parties. I hated Barbies growing up. My brother and I tortured them. I can't do hair. Though I can clean up like no bodies business and can go from barn bum to evening gown in no time at all.

I really want a girl. But what if she's a girly girl? I don't know how to do girly girl! I know how to play with Tonka trucks and Breyer horses and play in the sandbox.

When I babysat twins, one boy one girl, I was always so much better with the little boy than the little girl. He liked to ride bikes and watch hockey and horse racing. We played with action figures and built tall block castles just to destroy them.

11 days...... Then I'll figure it all out. Brush up on how to be a girly girl. Buy a Barbie. Or buy little baby Wranglers and a Tonka truck.